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happymash self-care isn't selfish

You Time, Self-Care, Sexual Wellbeing - These Are Not Selfish

Life in isolation is… same same but different. No matter what your situation, our individual lives no longer look and feel as they did. Things that once worried me, have been quickly side-lined or even forgotten about and those who I care about the most have become my top priority. I think a lot of women feel like this just now.

Generally we are the caring sex. It is in-built in our genes, it is instinctive and intuitive to want to check upon others and care for others where required. This isn’t to say that to not have these feelings or impulses make someone unwomanly, just in the same way it is not and should not be unwomanly for a woman to prioritise her own wellbeing.

If during lockdown, you are responsible for little ones (or big ones!) within your family, friends or neighbours, remember you cannot calmly and responsibly look after them unless you are well and healthy yourself. So what of the illnesses or ailments we experience which aren’t visible?

Being tired doesn’t bring with it a temperature, and feeling anxious or stressed doesn’t give you a runny nose or puffy eyes… we need to be honest with ourselves and admit that sometimes, we just need some me time, some self-care, some self-love, time alone. Whatever you call it, it’s incredibly important! How many minutes or hours have you got this week? I counted that over the weekend, I was actually only alone in my own company for about 1 hour in total… and by Sunday night I was acutely aware of this!

To make this most of this precious time, we must prioritise. You must know what relaxes you as well as be aware of what triggers you to feel down, makes you angry or irritable. But have you ever considered that exploring your own sexuality and desires might be part of the puzzle you’ve been missing? An hour to yourself could involve turning your phone on silent, reading a book or (my favourite), listening to an audio book, lying on your bed with the windows open and just listening to the birds outside whilst your curtains sway in the wind - bliss! And as little as 10 minutes of this time could be spent using your vibrator, to help boost your all-round mood for the rest of the day.

Masturbating allows your body to release such hormones as endorphins, oxytocin, prolactin, testosterone and dopamine. All have their own individual qualities and will leave you with a mood-enhancing boost to your day. Some women attribute this feeling to the way they felt when they first held their children or every time they breast-fed their babies which induces the body to release prolactin, oxytocin and endorphins.

Due to societal stigmas or religious pressures and rules, women often do not masturbate regularly and in some instances, have never tried it. I think this is so sad! Masturbation, like all aspects of your sexuality and your sex life, is completely up to you. It can be as private as you like, or something you talk about with your partner and your friends, should you wish.

How about I do you a favour though and shout loud and proud from my screen to yours: “HAVE A GO!”

A great philosophy to live by is to try things once. I promise you, unlike bungy jumping, flower arranging, stamp collecting, bird watching…. this is a hobby that will not disappoint!

Comment below to tell me about your experiences and whether or not you feel you can or want to make masturbation part of your mental health and wellbeing care routine.

Alternatively please check out my store where I have a limited number of carefully selected products on sale. Read the reviews to see how these have been helping women all around Australia and New Zealand to explore themselves.

Masturbation is your decision, it is private, it is empowering and it is fun. Have the confidence to trust yourself and your feelings and relax…


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