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What Does it Mean to be Happy?

Unfortunately due to almost-global travel restrictions, we cannot up and leave and travel to a yoga retreat on Bali, so how do we settle our everyday lives into the new normal  and feel happy?

Part of the essence of what it is to be human, is that we are constantly striving to better ourselves and improve our situation. Even if we cannot, even if we are not, it is deep within us to want to do better.

This is definitely true for women. We are planners, analysers, givers, we often put others before ourselves and don't mind being side-lined for the benefit of others or a family unit. But where does this leave our own personal happiness and wellbeing?

And how do we manage life in the time of Corona? With no definitive plans on the horizon, and with no way of planning for anything or any one other than keeping the fridge well-stocked and keeping our running shoes well-worn, how do we settle into this new norm so that we can say we are 'happy'? 

To make matters worse, some of us who are quarantining or self-isolating, are doing so alone. Presently, it is a commonly asked question: which is more difficult? Self-isolating with children and family or self-isolating alone?

Happiness is something that we can all agree, comes in waves. There are peaks and troughs in life whether we lead privileged lives or come from disadvantaged beginnings. I believe it is contentedness that we should be striving for, because how can any one be happy all the time? It is simply unachievable. And I think that true contentedness comes from being alright with that.

Take the troughs as they come, cross that bridge when you come to it, ride high on the peaks and make the most of them when they arise. Most importantly, congratulate ourselves for having made it!

My advice for life in the time of Corona - keep one or two ongoing projects on your 'to do' list. Never let yourself idle without purpose for too long, and don't worry if you never feel you get everything done - be kind to yourself - you're doing a great job!

Make room for daily you time. This might be a quiet 20 minutes sitting in silence or meditation, or reading a book, magazine or blog. It might be sitting with a cup of coffee in your garden or by your window, an extra guilt-free 20 minutes in bed or some alone time with your  favourite vibrator. Whether you can spare one hour or 10 minutes, time alone well-spent can fuel your energy for the rest of the day. Time alone can help you reflect on what stage of contentedness you're at - a peak, a trough, or climbing half way up the hill. Our feelings on the matter may change on a daily basis - and that's ok... we are human after all!

Check out my online store for ideas for sexual wellbeing and please comment below to continue the conversation!


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